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New “Discombobulations”

From “Dan and Stan: Misdirection”

Stan

Remember last month? You know, when we started out going to the gas station and ended up in Nebraska? All because you had to find out if there were drug dealers somewhere on Stoner Street?

Dan

Well, that’s just common sense…

Stan

No, it’s not, jackass. Nebraska’s like seven states away.

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From a Reader

This is why I do what I do.

(an email I received today)

“I just received your ‘Great Moments…’ in the mail…I have to tell you that I think ‘The Pistol Goes Off’ is one of the funniest pieces I have ever read. I am most anxious to read the book and the rest of the stories and only hope that they are half as good as Pete’s.”

The Night They Drove Old Dicksie Down

It’s been said that all good things must come to an end. Unfortunately, the lesser-known corollary to this oft-repeated philosophical gem is usually ignored: All really, really great things must also come to an end because human beings are infinitely stupid.

Such was the case with Storyville.

Controversial even at the time, the federally ordered closing of New Orleans’ Red Light District in 1917 has been described as “the worst idea since hemorrhoids” (me, 1989), “an economic Hindenburg” (me again, 1997), and “a steaming pile of typically Puritanical American horsecrap” (me yet again, yesterday morning).

Then-Mayor Martin Behrman did not go down without a fight, however. (Very much unlike the average New Orleans prostitute of the day.)

This transcript of a meeting between Behrman and Secretary of the Navy Josephus Daniels, cobbled together from various accounts later given by Daniels while under the influence of Afghani hashish, reveals a mayor pushed to the brink of desperation, a city leader clinging to the hope of saving Storyville.

Coming soon in the November New Orleans Levee…

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